Win a competitive eating contest (and other things I won’t accomplish before 30)


Tomorrow is the first day of the last year of my twenties. Starting at midnight, the clock will be ticking on all the things I once dreamed of doing before I turned 30. How does this make me feel? Just fine. Mostly, my “list” was frivolous and self-serving. Still, there’s a part of me that longs to squeeze some of these in during the next 365 days. I might as well write some down (along with some other random things), so at the end of this year I can look back and say, “Wow, I accomplished nothing, but at least I survived another trip around the sun.” Because really, that’s all I  hope to do.

15 Things I Won’t Accomplish Before 30:

1. Travel to Moscow
2. Become a millionaire
3. Strut the runway in Milan
4. Publish a novel (I very well may write one, but getting it published is another ordeal)
5. Have a third child (unless I get pregnant in the next three months, highly unlikely)
6. Learn to drive a stick-shift (I’m sure I could if I wanted to, but I have no desire)
7. Skydive (Again, I could if I wanted to, but there’s no way in h-e-double hockey sticks)
8. Run a marathon (I ran a half several years ago, and that was enough for me)
9. Win a competitive eating contest
10. Bust out of prison
11. Have all of my tattoos removed (I have none, so unless I decided to get a bunch, and then remove them, ain’t happening)
12. Ride a motorcycle (never have, not sure I care to)
13. Shoe a horse (although I may “shoo” a horse)
14. Hand dig a thousand holes for our Christmas tree farm using only a thimble (most random thing I could think of)
15. Photo bomb Ellen DeGeneres fist-bumping Adam Sandler (I was wrong about #14, this is the most random)

So, here’s to keeping my expectations low for the last year of my twenties, and just staying alive!


Let Me Tell You About My Other Brother

For awhile now, I’ve been sharing what’s on my heart about the tragic loss and aftermath of losing my brother Eric. But here’s the thing. God not only blessed me with one amazing brother, but with two. My brother Luke is five years older than me, and although we fought like crazy when we were young, I consider him one of my best friends now. And today is his birthday.

If I could turn back time, I would have a puppy party with him at sunset after finishing the dishes, share a bowl of ramen noodles in front of the wall furnace, fix a bowl of cockadoodledoo, watch back-to-back episodes of Star Trek (Captain Picard only, please), and sing every song in the Jungle Book sound track at the top of our lungs. These are only a few of the inside jokes and memories we share, and I realize now how lucky I am to have so many.

I love you Luke, and I am the luckiest girl in the world to have you for a brother. You’re one of the smartest, kindest, most generous people I know.


Happy Birthday big brother!




…and now!